12.21.16 Happiness BReakThrough!

handstand

The past few weeks I’ve been pondering the difference between happiness and contentment. My life is so full of Blessings. I have my obstacles as we all do, but overall my life is good. So why am I fighting this battle to feel truly happy with my life?

This weekend I was on tour with the VA Opera. Before leaving, we took some time to snap some dance pics outside. I told my friend that  I wished I could do this handstand that I Imagine myself doing in my mind. He told me to try it so I did. To both of our astonishment, I eased into this 1 arm handstand on the first try! (Above Picture) That was the first event leading to my breakthrough this weekend.

During down time, I started reading this book. After a few pages, I started to understand some important things about my own thought process and I was able to connect the dots within this mental struggle I’ve been dealing with for most of my life.

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Here’s the Breakdown…

Conscious Mind-I am blessed to have a full time job in the school system, a part time job teaching dance, and I am performing in 2 upcoming productions. I am happy and excited to be living my dream and doing what I love!

Subconscious Mind-I am 25 years old(which is old for an aspiring performer). I’m working 2 jobs and I am still broke. I need to be making more money, I need more opportunities, and I need to train more so that I can move out of Va within the next 2 years… I feel stuck and frustrated with my life.

Result-No matter what I accomplish, I’m left with a lingering feeling of disappointment. I am constantly fighting an internal conflict between feeling grateful/blessed and feeling frustrated/ dissatisfied. I am not able to fully accept my life as it is and feel truly happy.

So How do I bridge the Gap between these 2 worlds?

It all makes so much sense to me now. If the conflict is within my own mind, the answer must be there too. After reflecting on all of this and a recent conversation with a fellow performer, I knew what I needed to do.

Go back to the Basics, Remember Your Mindfulness Goals.-Remember that Life is a Journey not a Destination!

1. Trust that You are exactly where you need to be. Also Trust in Yourself and in your Own Abilities.

2. Remember that you are still learning. You’ve come a long way, but there is so much more to learn before you reach the top.

3. Be patient with yourself. Stop forcing deadlines onto your success and let things fall into place.

4.Learn to accept your life exactly as it is and exactly where you are.

5. Let go of Self Imposed Limitations and rigid expectations of how your life is supposed to Be!

6. Make time to do things you Love…even if you don’t gain anything from it. For years I’ve been saying I want to perform live,write songs, and create my own choreography. But there’s always a reason why I don’t do it. Many times I plan to, but then worrying about lack of money, time, and energy starts clouding my mind and my priorities shift.

7. As you are working towards your goals, Remember  your intentions. You perform because you love art, music, and dance and you could not possibly live life without it. This is not about money, attention, or popularity. This is is your Purpose! You deserve to live it with Joy and Peace,not Fear and Anxiety!!

Be Blessed!

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